Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Randomize