When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
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