Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
