Texts From Last Night

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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Everytime we come here you have an ex here.

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  (985): Everytime we come here you have an ex here. http://tfl.nu/ev6m
  Replies (16) Good night (623) Bad night (1055)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.

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  (908): My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size. http://tfl.nu/6vyk
  Replies (23) Good night (1018) Bad night (4281)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.

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  (541): Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist. http://tfl.nu/jqdb
  Replies (18) Good night (5381) Bad night (1013)
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.

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  (971): I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa. http://tfl.nu/0b4p
  Replies (28) Good night (5892) Bad night (1828)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now

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  (617): So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now http://tfl.nu/xd86
  Replies (3) Good night (2161) Bad night (687)
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  (707): View more from California

  admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.

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  (707): admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it. http://tfl.nu/03xs
  Replies (2) Good night (2100) Bad night (696)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..

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  (850): when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys.. http://tfl.nu/5j7g
  Replies (26) Good night (1250) Bad night (2755)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th

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  (201): I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th http://tfl.nu/okx6
  Replies (4) Good night (1804) Bad night (531)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.

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  (330): Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success. http://tfl.nu/8tcw
  Replies (2) Good night (969) Bad night (439)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Happy Birhtday!

  (289): View more from Ontario

  Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home

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  (416): Happy Birhtday! (289): Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home http://tfl.nu/oimr
  Replies (4) Good night (1985) Bad night (508)
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  (969): View more from

  You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?

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  (969): You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll? http://tfl.nu/xabj
  Replies (2) Good night (1015) Bad night (316)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value

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  (216): then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value http://tfl.nu/klpa
  Replies (3) Good night (1015) Bad night (410)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?

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  (267): do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate? http://tfl.nu/3j8j
  Replies (3) Good night (819) Bad night (363)
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food

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  (971): It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food http://tfl.nu/42uv
  Replies (1) Good night (524) Bad night (391)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.

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  (503): Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then. http://tfl.nu/8tlb
  Replies (0) Good night (632) Bad night (223)

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