you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
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