seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
