Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Bring me that man meat
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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