Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
