dude i'm inner monologue high
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
