Yo dont text me then not text me
I skipped work to stalk him.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
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