THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Randomize
