Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
