Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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