Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I can't turn off my feet"
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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