I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
try to milk me bitch
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