i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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