I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Everclear isn't food dammit
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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