here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
