I think i sorta joined a cult last night
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
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I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
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We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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