And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
