Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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