This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize