$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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