Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
so that wasnt chicken after all
My brain says no but my pants say off.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
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Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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