i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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