Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Randomize
