Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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