no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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