he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
