Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.