Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Randomize
