Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
