apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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