it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
