you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
