there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
The power of my boobs compel you
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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