So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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