69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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