You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
