I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
