no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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