You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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