I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
