i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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