Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
