Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
