love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
