worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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