Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
