Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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