1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
