Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
